Dave Gettleman Is Leading The New York Giants Into Bat Country

Feb 27, 2019; Indianapolis, IN, USA; New York Giants general manager Dave Gettleman speaks to the media during the 2019 NFL Combine at the Indianapolis Convention Center. Mandatory Credit: Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports

The best way to get through it is to take it one day at a time. Wake up, get through the first hour,  then the next until it’s time to go to sleep again and repeat the cycle. Try not to think about what happened, maybe even pretend it’s still February and none of The Idiot’s damage has been done yet. This is what I keep telling myself….but it doesn’t work. The Idiot is still running the New York Giants and there is nothing we can do about it.

There is a world where the Giants have Odell Beckham, Saquon Barkley, Josh Rosen, Josh Allen, and Landon Collins. It’s a wonderful place where a young nucleus is building towards respectability and there’s a clear path for the franchise. It’s made of candy canes and planes and bright, red choo choo trains and you know, I wish that I could go there.

Instead, I’m stuck in this reality where we have Eli Manning for 3 more years, to be followed up by Lloyd Christmas. All because of The Idiot…

He did his best to do the same thing in Carolina. How many times have you seen a team fire and replace a GM with the guy he replaced? It happened to The Idiot. He took a team (built on Cam Newton, Luke Keuchly, Thomas Davis and Greg Olson….all acquired before his tenure) that was 15-1 and a super bowl contender and brought them to 6-10, alienated the players, coaches and organization staffers and tried to force out most of the teams best players as their contracts came up….sound familiar?

Now like all GMs that don’t work for the Redskins, The Idiot has had his ok moments. He drafted Star Louteilei and Kawan Short back to back in the same draft in Carolina and took Saquon Barkley when everyone demanded a QB last year. Unfortunately, he continues to trade quarters for two nickels and a dime in the name of “team culture” and clearly has a plan in the same sense that Wily E. Coyote has one to catch the roadrunner. I’m pretty sure Golden Tate and Jabril Peppers came to the team in boxes stamped Acme.

So what do you do when your favorite NFL team is in the hands of not just an idiot but The Idiot? Well, you can move on for a few years and wait for him to be fired and catch up with the team when an executive who isn’t displaying signs of suffering from a head injury is running the franchise.

You can take to social media and throw your insults and frustration out into the other of the interweb and commiserate with other miserable fans. Finally, you can always drop some acid and act as if maybe his plan is so ingenious that you just can’t comprehend it, and Eli Manning will lead the team to back to back Super Bowls and the retire John Elway style.

I currently reside in Seattle and it’s almost shocking to watch a competent GM rebuild on the fly and keep his team in contention while turning over the roster. Schneider has let aging or expensive vets go at the right time, replenished with mostly mid to late round draft picks, and low-cost free agents. They may not be Championship contenders, but you can see the direction of where they are going, and the team surprised the NFL with last seasons strong showing in what was supposed to be a down year.

So what am I going to do this year? I’m treating the Giants season like a Pink Floyd laser light show at the planetarium and once again channeling my inner Hunter S. Thompson.  In my world The Idiot will be a genius, every wounded duck pass will leave trails in the air, and Eli Manning will be avoiding lizards and bats as he leads the team to victory. I’m psyched and ready for the season to come….now if only I could get some golf shoes…

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